Paralysis
by Zoe-M
Summary: Now he remained in the dark, while this time, it is I who entered the light.' Love is difficult, practically like a war, and sometimes, it just feels like fate is working against you. Riku/Sora


Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own Kingdom Hearts, but the idea for this story is my own.

Paralysis

An incessant buzz wrapped around my body, clinging to every nerve and sending hormones swirling. It hit worst in my stomach, fluttering and tingling like a bee near pollen. Just…hovering. Waiting. My throat dried up, raving to be quenched, but no words escaped. My heart thudded deep in my chest, and I hoped no-one heard it. The tingles travelled to the rest of my body, and I found my feet were glued to the floor. This feeling, it just…

Left my body paralysed.

And I? I was helpless to sit and watch, as he stole away my heart, and the words were stolen from my lips; so I'll here, in the darkness, and hope someday the paralysis will go away. That someday, I'll be able to say the words my heart was aching for. To say those words that would set me free.

But instead, I turned away, and I tried to forget. I saw the way he looks at _her_. I saw the way he _doesn't_ look at me. And from then I knew; those words could never be spoken and it drove me crazy.

I wanted to tell him. I wanted for once, to speak the words my body longed for. I wanted to speak the _truth_. But like they say, the truth _hurts_. So like any other, I tried to deny it, to avoid the relentless pain I knew was approaching. I tried to laugh it off. I tried to fool myself, for I couldn't love him; we were _just friends_. I tried to pretend I didn't care.

But the words still swirled around my mind, like the incessant buzz around my body. So I walked, hoped, and prayed, that he would give me a chance. See me for _me_, and not as just the friend. I wanted more. And by then, I was so far gone that fear didn't faze me. There were no ifs. There were no buts. There was nothing but the truth.

So I walked right up to him, saw the light clung to his body like the darkness was to mine, saw the grin upon his lips that sent the tingles back into my stomach, then I saw his eyes, and I got lost in them. I couldn't speak. I couldn't—I wanted…but I couldn't. So I shook my head to rid this feeling, this gut-wrenching feeling, smiled, and lied with all the power within me, and it tore me apart.

And you know, the worst part was, he never knew the pain he caused me, just as the sheer joy he gave me. So when I laid there on my deathbed, I hoped and prayed the truth would set me free. I turned and whispered, hoped for one last chance, one moment to believe in, "Sora, I—" but I was never given a chance to finish that sentence, as death tore me away. And this time I was truly left paralysed. Now he remained in the dark, while this time, it is I who entered the light.

I tried to scream and shout, but the light engulfed me too fast, and quickly, the bonds were broken. But I fought, and fought. I had to tell him. I just had to. And in what seemed like an eternity, I was brought back to the Earth.

But something wasn't quite right. When I spoke he didn't hear me, and when I placed my hand upon his jaw he didn't recognise my touch. He just cried and cried, looking down at his arms. And it was then I realised, I wasn't in my body anymore. And it was then, which I became truly helpless.

He just cried and cried, cradling my body in his arms. I wished I could comfort him, but that power had been stripped from me.

"Riku…" he mumbled, "Why was I always too late for you? Why didn't I—". He sighed; another tear maimed his beautiful face.

"It's okay, I'm here," I said, but he never heard me. But what would it matter? I'm dead, he's alive, and there's one big uncrossable river between us, and no turning back. I couldn't do anything. I didn't even _exist_. So I placed my hand on his cheek and wiped away his tears. I didn't know if he'd hear me, but I had to speak those words before my time ran out. So I pressed my lips to his ear, and whispered those three little words, and hoped, just for a moment, that things might be okay.

That was my last moment on Earth, and now I walk in the light. People say that when you die, everything fades into darkness, but they're wrong. It fades into light, and it's then, which we truly see.

Did you ever know what it's like to watch the one you loved, cry tears for you, and you couldn't even say 'it's okay'? Did you ever see their heart break into a thousand pieces? Did you ever know what it's like to realise you just wasted your life away, and you just missed all your chances?

_I_ have.

And did you ever see them waste their lives, simply because yours ended?

Life is full of chances; chances that can easily be taken away as swiftly as they arrive, so when someone says follow your heart, don't deny it, listen to it; take your chances. Otherwise you'll just end up like me; just another lost soul, just wishing they'd taken their chances, just wishing for another that couldn't ever be.

I missed my chances. Don't let fear waste yours too.

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A/N: Hey, thanks for reading and if you have a spare minute, review! :) x


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